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DonFck
Hibernator
+3,226|4106|Turku, Finland

So you're up shits creek without a paddle. What do you do? The question you should ask yourself is "What would MacGyver do?" and continue from there.

https://img12.imageshack.us/img12/5753/macgyver2rs.png

I got a Swiss army knife when I was a kid. This was naturally because I watched MacGyver and I therefore REALLY wanted one. To this day, I still have it. Of course, I've lost my toothpick and tweezers but who hasn't? This tool has come to my rescue numerous times, screw Leatherman.

Small moments of ingenuity that solve problems, big or small, I want you to share them. And no, they don't have to include the knife.

I'll start with something as simple as this: The other day I bought a large poster with the Beatles jumping in the air and wanted it framed, so off to Ikea I went. At the parking lot I realized that I have no idea of the measurements for the poster and I'm too lazy to go into the store for one of those paper measuring tapes they have everywhere at Ikea.

With nothing to measure with, I started to think of any object that has a standard measure when it came to me: Aren't cigarettes about 80mm? I estimated the poster to be 60x90, bought a frame and it fit perfectly.

What's your MacGyver-moment?
https://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t63/DonFck/SG-sig1.jpg
Varegg
Support fanatic :-)
+2,205|4284|Nårvei

I once folded a paper airplane from gum wraps and rescued 98 people from certain death ...
Wait behind the line ..............................................................
GodFather
Blademaster's bottom bitch
+387|3694|Phoenix, AZ
I was at school and a kid had some buds to share, so I made a piece in the last 10 minutes of english class using only the things in my immediate area... shit worked, too.
Man With No Name
جندي
+148|3049|The Wild West
I started a bradley by banging on the engine a few times with a ball peen hammer
JahManRed
wank
+646|4102|IRELAND

Opening a beer bottle with another beer bottle.
Ultrafunkula
Lose 1 sanity
+1,970|3948|6 6 4 oh, I forget

For the amusement to our younger readers (Gooners), I have used the words; screw, drill, nut, fuck, Russian prostituta, knob and hole in the following presentation.

Last year shortly after moving in our new place, I was installing a lamp in the seeling at home. But the plastic thingy in the seeling was too flexible for it to hold the lamp steady with only one screw. So I drilled a second hole. Now the only screw in the toolbox that would fit the hole of the metal piece in the lamp was not a normal one. The screw is long and the spiral didn't go all the way to the hat of the screw, so putting a nut on it won't do Jack Schitt since the screw is coming down from the hole like a Russian prostituta. Now since it's atleast 3km to the local hardware store and I'm too fucking lazy I go digging further in the toolbox. Magic! I find a plastic doorknob from an Ikea bathroom closet that I didn't use. So I drill a hole in it for the screw to go through. Hooray! Ergo I can use the nut to tighten the screw and the lamp perfectly, but. Since the doorknob is too smooth and shiny I took a bigger drill bit to make a tad bigger hole for the nut to fit in. The finalisation of the hole I carved with a knife to make the inner surface edgy so the nut would stick in place and not roll around. Vi-ola! Now I have a lamp sitting in the seeling with a perfectly nice final temporary installation.
Dilbert_X
The X stands for
+1,592|3580|eXtreme to the maX
I once made a 3D copy router using an old door - and a router obviously.
Your virus system is infected with windows. Please to be giving me your credit card details urgently
FatherTed
xD
+3,936|3974|so randum
out of filters?

this cotton wool might work...

and it did!



no bottle opener?

knock the cap on a wall with the heel of your palm

and it did!
Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella
JahManRed
wank
+646|4102|IRELAND

FatherTed wrote:

knock the cap on a wall with the heel of your palm

and it did!
Its a mans duty to learn how to open a beer bottle with a lighter...........your not a man until you learn.

1. Place bottle neck between forefinger and thumb with bottle top about 15mm above knuckle.
2.Place lighter on the knuckle of the thumb & edge of lighter bellow bottle top rim.
3. Leaver the lighter over your thumb while lifting your thumb up slightly in the same movement.
4. Top pops off.
FatherTed
xD
+3,936|3974|so randum
i can do it with my zippo, but the case is a bit fragile so i tend to avoid it
Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella
DonFck
Hibernator
+3,226|4106|Turku, Finland

JahManRed wrote:

FatherTed wrote:

knock the cap on a wall with the heel of your palm

and it did!
Its a mans duty to learn how to open a beer bottle with a lighter...........your not a man until you learn.

1. Place bottle neck between forefinger and thumb with bottle top about 15mm above knuckle.
2.Place lighter on the knuckle of the thumb & edge of lighter bellow bottle top rim.
3. Leaver the lighter over your thumb while lifting your thumb up slightly in the same movement.
4. Top pops off.
I do that, but I use my forefinger instead of my thumb. Interesting..
https://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t63/DonFck/SG-sig1.jpg
Varegg
Support fanatic :-)
+2,205|4284|Nårvei

DonFck wrote:

JahManRed wrote:

FatherTed wrote:

knock the cap on a wall with the heel of your palm

and it did!
Its a mans duty to learn how to open a beer bottle with a lighter...........your not a man until you learn.

1. Place bottle neck between forefinger and thumb with bottle top about 15mm above knuckle.
2.Place lighter on the knuckle of the thumb & edge of lighter bellow bottle top rim.
3. Leaver the lighter over your thumb while lifting your thumb up slightly in the same movement.
4. Top pops off.
I do that, but I use my forefinger instead of my thumb. Interesting..
I know this girl that opens beer bottles with her teeth ... no surprice she is the male one in a lesbian relationship ... I do the lighter trick myself
Wait behind the line ..............................................................
Peter
Super Awesome Member
+494|3876|dm_maidenhead
I once opened a bottle of beer with a sheet of paper
DonFck
Hibernator
+3,226|4106|Turku, Finland

Peter wrote:

I once opened a bottle of beer with a sheet of paper
Hardcore. Explain or it didn't happen.

Another story, from 10 years back:

My friend managed to misplace his car keys when sleeping over at his girlfriends. He lived about 15 miles from her so he really needed that car to get back home. So he called me to give him a lift. Hung over as I was I thought "Fuck that I ain't driving there and back" but went to check out the situation anyway. I mean, he needed the keys to drive there in the first place, right? So he must have them.

I get on location and indeed his car is locked and the keys are not in sight inside. So I decided to do the following:

The car was an '81 Opel Kadett, so the locks weren't precisely top notch, if you get my drift. I remembered a lesson in lock picking and, went round the apartment building to the back and looked for a rake with flat metal pins (these are everywhere and it was late summer, as illustrated heaa).

I bent off one of the flat pins and used it to pick the lock to get in, it was easier than peeing in the bowl sitting down. So into the ignition lock the pin went and after a couple of twists and pin length adjustments, the bloody thing started. I called my friend to look outside and soon after he drove home with a rake pin sticking up from his ignition, hoping that the cops don't stop him as he'd have some explaining to do.
https://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t63/DonFck/SG-sig1.jpg
~Smokey~
Steve Irwin Reincarnate
+396|4012|Internetfitlerland

Varegg wrote:

DonFck wrote:

JahManRed wrote:


Its a mans duty to learn how to open a beer bottle with a lighter...........your not a man until you learn.

1. Place bottle neck between forefinger and thumb with bottle top about 15mm above knuckle.
2.Place lighter on the knuckle of the thumb & edge of lighter bellow bottle top rim.
3. Leaver the lighter over your thumb while lifting your thumb up slightly in the same movement.
4. Top pops off.
I do that, but I use my forefinger instead of my thumb. Interesting..
I know this girl that opens beer bottles with her teeth ... no surprice she is the male one in a lesbian relationship ... I do the lighter trick myself
Failing that, smash the neck of the bottle on a rock and try not to cut your lips.
JahManRed
wank
+646|4102|IRELAND

Varegg wrote:

DonFck wrote:

JahManRed wrote:


Its a mans duty to learn how to open a beer bottle with a lighter...........your not a man until you learn.

1. Place bottle neck between forefinger and thumb with bottle top about 15mm above knuckle.
2.Place lighter on the knuckle of the thumb & edge of lighter bellow bottle top rim.
3. Leaver the lighter over your thumb while lifting your thumb up slightly in the same movement.
4. Top pops off.
I do that, but I use my forefinger instead of my thumb. Interesting..
I know this girl that opens beer bottles with her teeth ... no surprice she is the male one in a lesbian relationship ... I do the lighter trick myself
You can use your figure, but you don't get the added leverage you get by lifting your thumb at the same time.

My sister used to open beer bottles with her teeth until I showed her the lighter trick.
Flecco
iPod is broken.
+1,048|4139|NT, like Mick Dundee

~Smokey~ wrote:

Varegg wrote:

DonFck wrote:


I do that, but I use my forefinger instead of my thumb. Interesting..
I know this girl that opens beer bottles with her teeth ... no surprice she is the male one in a lesbian relationship ... I do the lighter trick myself
Failing that, smash the neck of the bottle on a rock and try not to cut your lips.
I think I've done that before...
Australian culture is about two things, football and racism.

I never know what to kick.
~FuzZz~
.yag era uoy fi siht deaR
+422|3797|Orrstrayleea
https://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t232/Man_on_Fire_2007/34124213412-1.jpg
This what happens when no one brings papers/bongs and we need something to smoke out of
Macbeth
Banned
+2,389|3060

Several roaches -> a bong hit
thraSK
Best ___ in Aus
+57|3457
Or coke bottle / foil / stolen garden hose
JahManRed
wank
+646|4102|IRELAND

Or coke can crushed in the middle to create a cradle, puncture a few holes with a drawing pin in said cradle. Suck. Makes you look like a crack addict tho.
I have to say that the majority of my MacGyver moments have been to get wasted in one form or another.
JdeFalconr
Lex Luthor, King of Australia
+71|4016|Mercer Island, WA
One time after showering I discovered that the doorknob on our bathroom had broken, leaving me stuck inside the bathroom. As my wife had left for work I had to break myself out. I used the file on a pair of nail clippers to unscrew the cover to the doorknob and pry it off. From there I was able to use the same nail clippers and a rubber band (file on the clippers to push it, rubber band to hold it in place...I could only push it so far) to push back the little post that retracts out of the doorframe, thus allowing me to swing the door open.

Last edited by JdeFalconr (2009-05-26 07:39:15)

https://bf3s.com/sigs/e03199ea9f2f69ef53b764100ebe0d9420ddb1b5.png
ATG
Banned
+5,233|4003|Global Command
My wife locked her keys in her car.
I had some scrap sheet metal and a pair of tin snips. I cut a slim jim and hand the door open faster than she could dial AAA.
FatherTed
xD
+3,936|3974|so randum
i was locked out once in the rain, and all i could get inside was the garage (seperate from the house u c)

and it was raining, noone would be home for hoooouuuurrrrs (like 7) so i didnt really wanna sit in a cold garage.


soooooooo

i got a drill and some wire out the garage, drilled a tiny hole in one of the side windows (bay windows), fed the wire through til i was able to lift the catch up. then i sorta jumped-fell inside (this window was sort of in a bush) and got some polyfiller to fill the little drilled hole up.

tada
Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella
Winston_Churchill
Bazinga!
+521|4213|Toronto | Canada

FatherTed wrote:

i was locked out once in the rain, and all i could get inside was the garage (seperate from the house u c)

and it was raining, noone would be home for hoooouuuurrrrs (like 7) so i didnt really wanna sit in a cold garage.


soooooooo

i got a drill and some wire out the garage, drilled a tiny hole in one of the side windows (bay windows), fed the wire through til i was able to lift the catch up. then i sorta jumped-fell inside (this window was sort of in a bush) and got some polyfiller to fill the little drilled hole up.

tada
Im calling your mother!

But I had a somewhat similar story - I could only get in the garage and not into the house, so I took the ladder from the garage and climbed on the roof. From there I just pulled out one of the really old windows and climbed in the house.  We replaced that window like a month later

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